if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize