Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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