saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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