I hate your face
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?