its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka