Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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