apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
