I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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