R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize