i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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