If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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