Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
