Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
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you are never too drunk for berry picking
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
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Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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