He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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