She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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