STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
