i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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