As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize