so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.