brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I have fence marks all over my body
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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