you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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