Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
we made out on top of his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize