just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.