In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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