Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me