Texts From Last Night

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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request

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  (908): no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request http://tfl.nu/jdk4
  Replies (18) Good night (3783) Bad night (811) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore

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  (480): Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore http://tfl.nu/oifq
  Replies (27) Good night (664) Bad night (5121) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad

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  (608): you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad http://tfl.nu/bx6b
  Replies (9) Good night (3740) Bad night (987) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me

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  (402): your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me http://tfl.nu/38h8
  Replies (28) Good night (7260) Bad night (736) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.

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  (845): You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately. http://tfl.nu/vwdv
  Replies (9) Good night (5476) Bad night (910)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance

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  (936): Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance http://tfl.nu/8uw4
  Replies (38) Good night (1854) Bad night (9757)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand

  (816): View more from Missouri

  team rage. no explanation necessary

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  (636): I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand (816): team rage. no explanation necessary http://tfl.nu/mquv
  Replies (2) Good night (1537) Bad night (2820)
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  (562): View more from California

  It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.

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  (562): It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice. http://tfl.nu/vbsf
  Replies (28) Good night (4709) Bad night (3462) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?

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  (937): Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship? http://tfl.nu/9ufc
  Replies (12) Good night (3768) Bad night (836) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dangr zzzzzzzzone

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  (610): Dangr zzzzzzzzone http://tfl.nu/qvjb
  Replies (8) Good night (1888) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.

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  (515): No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today. http://tfl.nu/dl5o
  Replies (2) Good night (1193) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?

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  (208): And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs? http://tfl.nu/xb1m
  Replies (2) Good night (1346) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.

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  (906): Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die. http://tfl.nu/zxmz
  Replies (7) Good night (2323) Bad night (301)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.

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  (412): so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head? (724): stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final. http://tfl.nu/zs0y
  Replies (2) Good night (1251) Bad night (256)
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  (585): View more from New York

  shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry

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  (585): shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry http://tfl.nu/7vhr
  Replies (0) Good night (202) Bad night (240) Order T-Shirt

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