You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
false alarm, still single
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
