Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
