Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
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He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
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It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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