I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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