That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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