Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no