very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.