Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
