So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I believe in your delicious
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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