thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
need another drink. this is the easiest way
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize