i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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