i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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