The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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