and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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