He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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