watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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