I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
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