And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
