I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize