hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
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