They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
sarcasm needs its own font
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
