i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
