He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
