do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
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The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
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He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
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