drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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